In a couple of weeks, I’m going in for some hip surgery. It’s not major surgery and not really what I’m writing about today.
You see, in the lead-up to the surgery, I had to get an MRI of my hip… with contrast. Contrast means they had to inject some dye into the hip before scanning me, and the injection had to be done under a fluoroscope.
But that’s not what I’m writing about today either. I’m writing about pubic hair.
Because before the contrast injection, I was subject to the inept ministrations of a nurse who had to shave a tiny patch of my pubes off before the doctor arrived to do the injecting.
Nurses are fantastic people. I think many of them are heroes. I think expecting them to be experts at manscaping is expecting too much of them and this nurse demonstrated that limitation horrifically.
Following the procedure, I was a little sore from the injection but I had seriously painful razor burns where nurse De Sade had literally left her mark. Had I known what I was in for, I’d have taken care of that little detail myself and spared myself the pain.
As the little patch has grown back I have become increasingly aware of how much I love my pubes. I have a special love for all the hair that grows on my penis and scrotum. I do trim ever so slightly, but I value that hair and would hate to be without it, even a little of it, for long.
Further, I rate body hair as my number one specific turn-on. Furry legs, arms bellies and crotches can get me easily over a dozen other aspects that are less than optimal in a sex partner, and the mere touch of a hairy thigh brushing against my scrotum is often the trigger to a full-on orgasm. I am turned on to hairy guys in a major, major way.
Add to that my specific dislike of shaved skin and naturally hairless guys. I know this is a big turn-on for many men but for me, it is a bonafide boner-killer. Smooth doesn’t work for me and depilated chests, backs, legs and especially, genitals, can put the brakes on an otherwise great time in a New York minute.
And I… I am a relatively smooth guy. Yes, I have a modest amount of hair on my crotch and balls and a little in my ass-crack. I also have a little thatch in the middle of my chest and a dusting on my stomach but in all honesty, I have to simply own that I am pretty smooth. My butt cheeks and legs feel smooth as silk. I do not count that as a good thing.
And I do like my body. A lot. I’m profoundly grateful for it and I think I’m doing damn well with my 57 year-old, formerly fat body. I actually love my body, flaws (real and perceived) and all…
I would fuck me.
So. I’m a relatively smooth guy with a major body hair perv and an upcoming medical procedure that’s going to require depilation on a little more aggressive level than I prefer… What’s a JackDaddy to do?
I’m going to completely shave my dick. By “shave my dick” I mean I’m going to completely shave off the hair on my pubis, penis, scrotum and upper thigh. I am going to take just a small risk in leaving my modest ass-crack hair untouched, only because my ass has been fully shaved before and the discomfort of crack-hair regrowing is pure torture. I’m just going to trust that the docs don’t need to mess with my ass.
I am doing this for two reasons:
- I’d rather do it myself, with care, than trust the deed to some nurse who could leave me with a vicious razor burn where I seriously do NOT need it and…
- I like fucking with my own established prejudices.
I’m going to not only shave down my cock and balls to their oversized infantile state, I’m going to do my utmost to actually enjoy my bald man penis while it lasts. I’m also going to chronicle the experience before the shave, before the surgery and during my recovery… by which I mean the slow regrowth of my treasured meadow of manhood.
So here’s my unexcited, barely tended, natural penis in all its moderately-hairy glory…
I am not a “dick pic” guy. There is nothing particularly wonderful to me about a photo of my own cock (or anyone else’s) without a face attached to a body. This is just an illustration of the fact of my beloved penis as it is today, as it is most of my life. It just is. It simply offers a snapshot of my status quo.
This Tuesday, I’ll be at my jack-off club, digging fully into the love of cock that is the Jacks and my penis is going to look different, more like this moist meatiness, and specifically sharing my fuzzy buddy with my friends, loving the fingers caressing and petting my bush, the lingering scent of crotch sweat on my fingers and the electrical buzz of the scrotum hair being tickled. I’m going to enjoy that bate like my last meal, even though I know full-well that I have ten more days before my hip goes into the shop.
Next week, I will probably masturbate every day. Maybe I’ll have a little sex too but on Thursday morning, August 27, I will carefully trim my dick and then mow the whole playground completely smooth.
And then… I will indulge in a prolonged session of self-love, doing my best to accept and even embrace my infantilized genitalia and bestow a mighty orgasm upon myself.
The next day… surgery… and the start of my own pubic hair renaissance.
Writer, singer, baker, Mac geek, production artist, “daddy” and the founder/manager of Rain City Jacks, a non-profit J/O club in Seattle, Washington.